Mysterious INFJ

I have taken these personality tests for years and I ALWAYS get the same results: INFJ, which stands for Introverted INtuitive Feeling Judging. Only 1% of people have my personality, so it is one many find quite mysterious.

*INFJs are introspective, caring, sensitive, gentle and complex people that strive for peace and derive satisfaction from helping others.

*INFJs are highly intuitive, empathetic and dedicated listeners. They have a special ability to listen to people, never push people away and are always prepared to listen for as long as it takes to make others feel better, even if they theoretically have better things to do.

*The INFJ is as genuinely warm as they are complex. INFJs hold a special place in the heart of people who they are close to, who are able to see their special gifts and depth of caring. This natural empathy and caring helps to be really effective at helping others through problems. In this manner, they make great friends, counselors, teachers, and mates.



*They are very sensitive to conflict, and cannot tolerate it very well. Situations which are charged with conflict may drive the normally peaceful INFJ into a state of agitation or charged anger. Although they are generally soft-spoken and gentle, they may become stubborn and sharp-tongued at times when their expectations aren't met, or when under a lot of stress.

*INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people -- a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or obvious "soul mates."

*NFJs are champions of the oppressed and downtrodden. They often are found in the wake of an emergency, rescuing those who are in acute distress.



*INFJs are warm, considerate partners who feel great depth of love for their partners. They enjoy showing this love, and want to receive affirmation back from their mates. They are perfectionists, constantly striving to achieve the Perfect Relationship. This can sometimes be frustrating to their mates, who may feel put upon by the INFJs demanding perfectionism. However, it may also be greatly appreciated, because it indicates a sincere commitment to the relationship, and a depth of caring which is not usually present in other types.


*Sexually, INFJs view intimacy as a nearly spiritual experience. They embrace the opportunity to bond heart and soul with their mates. As service-oriented individuals, it's very important to them that their mates are happy. Intimacy is an opportunity for the INFJ to selflessly give their love, and experience it in a tangible way.

*Idealist women tend to be very romantic. They love to give and receive tokens of affection, such as an original poem, a hand carved box, or an item which reminds them of some shared experience. Men often appreciate their compassion and empathy along with their belief in others.


*INFJ is a natural nurturer; patient, devoted and protective. They make loving parents and usually have strong bonds with their offspring. They have high expectations of their children, and push them to be the best that they can be. This can sometimes manifest itself in the INFJ being hard-nosed and stubborn. But generally, children of an INFJ get devoted and sincere parental guidance, combined with deep caring. Children of INFJs remember their parents fondly as warm, patient, and inspirational.

*The INFJ is likely to spend a lot of time socialing with family members. After that, the INFJ may have friends represented from any of the personality types. All kinds of people are drawn towards the INFJ. They are usually quite popular, although they may be unaware of it themselves, because they don't place a lot of importance on it. The INFJ is valued by their close friends for their warmth and consideration and for their ability to inspire and motivate others to be the best that they can be.

*Family events are opportunities for INFJs to explore and learn, so they are attended with eagerness and satisfaction. If family events are sources of tension, INFJs will tend to shun them, even be terrified by them. If, on the other hand, they are filled with warmth and joy, INFJs can become quite involved, though often in a more passive than active way.



*They are likely to enjoy research and will go great lengths to find answers. INFJs enjoy investigating the possibilities and meanings beyond the actual facts and realities. Reading holds a particular fascination for them because it allows them to have quiet reflection time and engages their imagination. They also like the written word (and rely on it more than the spoken word) since it is usually better structured and more coherent with a ready-made framework.

*INFJs have a knack for fluency in language and facility in communication. Usually self-expression comes more easily to INFJs on paper, as they tend to have strong writing skills. INFJs have vivid imaginations exercised both as memory and intuition, and this can amount to genius, resulting at times in an INFJ's being seen as mystical. This unfettered imagination often will enable this person to compose complex and often aesthetic works of art such as music, mathematical systems, poems, plays, and novels. In a sense, the INFJ is the most poetic of all the types. INFJs may be attracted to writing as a profession, and often they use language which contains an unusual degree of imagery. They are masters of the metaphor, and both their verbal and written communications tend to be elegant and complex.


*INFJs value their integrity a great deal. They are generally "doers" as well as great dreamers. They also are constantly in a state of self-renewal. They search for their unique identity and place in the world, constantly defining this better. They are activists there for the cause, not for the power. Strongly humanitarian in outlook, INFJs tend to be idealists, and because of their J preference for closure and completion, they are generally "doers" as well as dreamers. This rare combination of vision and practicality often results in INFJs taking a disproportionate amount of responsibility in the various causes to which so many of them seem to be drawn.



*Since INFJs have such strong value systems, and persistent intuitive visions which lend them a sense of "knowing", they do best in positions in which they are leaders, rather than followers. Although they can happily follow individuals who are leading in a direction which the INFJ fully supports, they will very unhappy following in any other situation.



*In the workplace, the INFJ usually shows up in areas where they can be creative and somewhat independent. INFJs can also be found in service-oriented professions. INFJs are future oriented, and direct their insight and inspiration toward the understanding of themselves and thereby human nature. Their work mirrors their integrity, and it needs to reflect their inner ideals. Beneath the quiet exterior, INFJs hold deep convictions about the weightier matters of life. Those who are activists -- INFJs gravitate toward such a role -- are there for the cause, not for personal glory or political power.








Possible Weaknesses in Relating to Others

* May apply their judgment more often towards others, rather than towards themselves
* With their ability to see an issue from many sides, they may always find others at fault for any problems in their lives
* May have unrealistic and/or unreasonable expectations of others
* May be intolerant of weaknesses in others
* May believe that they're always right
* May have an intense and quick temper
* May hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people
* May be wishy-washy and unsure how to act in situations that require quick decision making
* May have difficulty communicating their thoughts and feelings to others
* May see so many tangents everywhere that they can't stay focused on the bottom line or the big picture
* Extreme dislike of conflict and criticism
* Not good with money or practical day-to-day life necessities

Gist of Strengths

* Warm and affirming by nature
* Sensitive and compassionate towards people
* Have very high expectations for themselves and others (both a strength and weakness)
* Good listeners
* Complex and deep
* Service-oriented
* Value deep, authentic relationships
* great depth of personality - intricately and deeply woven, mysterious, and highly complex, sometimes puzzling even to themselves
* Usually have good communication skills, especially written
* Highly principled
* Quiet leaders
* Future-oriented
* Constantly seeking meaning and purpose in everything
* Creative and visionary
* An INFJ has a "stick to it" attitude. They're not afraid of hard work, and will put forth a great deal of effort towards something that they believe in. This persistence will help the INFJ to achieve an identified goal.
* Perfectionistic and idealistic, they always strive for the best.
* Usually intelligent and able to concentrate and focus, the INFJ can usually grasp difficult ideas and concepts.
* Introverted
* Abstract in communicating
* Live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities - part of an unusually rich inner life
* Artistic (and natural affinity for art), creative, and easily inspired
* Very independent
* Orderly view towards the world but within themself arranged in a chaotic, complex way only they could understand
*Enjoys change, challenge, and variety
*Dreamers whose genius, caring, and concern can be an inspiration to many other people

What Is On My Nightstand?

We just set up a new computer, and for some reason it is not allowing me to copy and paste anything. So for now, I have no pictures, but wanted to participate in this month's "What's On Your Nightstand?":

http://www.5minutesforbooks.com/

Here are the books that I am currently reading. I have been picking up whichever one I feel in the mood for at any given moment.

1) Do You Think I'm Beautiful?: The Question Every Woman Asks by Angela Thomas. (This book is FULL of insights and the author is so real and transparent)

2) Girl Perfect: Confessions of a Former Runway Model by Jennifer Strickland (This is a great look into our desire for attention and how God transformed a model and met the needs her fame and beauty could not)

3) Strong Women, Soft Hearts: A Woman's Guide to Cultivating a Wise Heart and a Passionate Life by Paula Rinehart (I have still not read the whole book...it is AWESOME, and very deep which is why I am reading it slowly)

4) Ruby Slippers: How the Soul of a Woman Brings Her Home by Jonalyn Fincher (There were a couple parts I did not agree with in this book, but I am still finding it a worthy read and life transforming in many parts!)

5) 101 Ways to Get and Keep His Attention by Michelle Hammond (This may sound like a desparate title LOL, but it is actually a great book and easy read on what MEN say grabs them about women and this is a good reminder even for wives who want to KEEP their man's attention)

6) Secrets of Eve: Understanding the Mystery of Female Sexuality by Archibald Hart (I just started this book. It is thick and looks very promising to reveal a woman's sexuality on deeper levels. It is not just a book about sex, but sexuality.)

These are the books I will begin reading this month (before the next what is on your nightstand):

7) Sacred Romance: Drawing Closer to the Heart of God by Brent Curtis and John Eldredge (I am really looking forward to this book!!! I read Captivating and it changed my life. I am looking forward to understanding more how God romances me!)

8) Havah: the Story of Eve by Tosca Lee (This is the only fictional book I am reading. I am sort of doing a study on the beginning of femininity, not just femininity in general. I am trying to grasp a greater understanding of the first woman on earth and God's intentions for womanhood. So I am hoping this book may provide some insights for me even though it is fiction.)

9) Lifegiving: Discovering the Secrets to a Beautiful Life by Tammy Maltby (Just looked like an awesome book into the life giving role of women and I am really looking forward to reading it!)

10) Eve's Revenge: Women and a Spirituality of the Body by Lilian Barger (This should be interesting. It is about how a woman's body is more than just physical, but how it is connecting to things spiritual. Yet the descriptions on amazon are much deeper than mine, so check them out. God has been speaking much to me about my body as of late...about a woman's body. I am feeling there is more than meets the eye and just obeying God in His leading me to read this book...)

11) Five Little Questions That Reveal the Life God Designed For You by Dannah Gresh (see below for more)

12) Pathway to Purpose for Women: Connecting Your To-Do List, Your Passions and God's Purposes for Your Life by Katie Brazelton (This book and the one before it sort of speak for themselves. Basically, I am hoping they will help me understand the calling on my life better and balance the reality of demands with fulfilling my goals and passions).

Now if I happen to read all these before the month is up (LOL) the next two books on my shelf that I am looking forward to reading are:

* The Allure of Hope: God's Pursuit of a Woman's Heart by Jan Meyers

* Falling in Love With Jesus: Abandoning Yourself to the Greatest Romance of Your Life by Dee Brestin

Made in God's Image, as a Female: Mystery and Romance

For more Feminine Fridays, go here


Yesterday I wrote my first post regarding exactly how women bear the image of God in their female design. I spoke of how the beauty of woman reveals God's beauty to us, and the truth that God wants us to delight in that beauty, to enjoy His beauty, and desire Him; all the same things a woman longs for. Read my first post here

In my first post I shared the following quote which is from a letter my husband wrote to me:

"Some may say there's not much in a name, but I say there is much in the name of the one I love. She, Esther Ruth, is a "star" in my life. Out of her shines what I call true beauty; a beauty that this fallen world knows not much of. Just like the distant stars of the sky, there is a mystery about her. This mystery beckons me to stare long and hard at who she really is. Where does she come from? What's going on in the midst of her?"

I stated how perfectly those words illustrate the first three qualities I would speak of: beauty, mystery and romance (or being pursued). Today I will write about the later two of the three. Most of my quotes are taken from John and Stasi Eldredge's book entitled "Captivating".

2) After her beauty, it is in her mystery that a woman bears the image of God.

"The kind of beauty a confident woman possesses is an odd mix of mystery and warm allure that invites you always a little deeper into the essence of really knowing her." (Paula Rinehart)

"Writing a book for men (Wild at Heart) was a fairly straight-forward proposition. Not that men are simpletons. But they are the less complicated of the two genders...both men and women know this to be true. The mystery of the feminine heart was meant to be a good thing, by the way. A source of joy. Yet it has become a source of shame- women almost universally feel that they are 'too much'...and men tend to pull away from the deeper waters of a woman's soul, unsure of what they will find there or how to handle it. And so we have missed the treasure that is the heart of a woman, missed the richness femininity was meant to bring to our lives, missed the way it speaks to us of the heart of God."

"One of the deepest ways a woman bears the image of God is in her mystery. By 'mystery' we don't mean 'forever beyond your knowing,' but 'something to be explored.' Prov 25:2 "God yearns to be known. But he wants to be sought after by those who would know him. He says, 'You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.' (Jer. 29:13)"

"Is not the Trinity a great mystery? Not something to be solved, but known with ever-deepening pleasure and awe, something to be enjoyed. Just like God, a woman is not a problem to be solved, but a vast wonder to be enjoyed. This is so true of her sexuality. Few women can or even want to 'just do it.' Foreplay is crucial to her heart, the whispering and loving and exploring of one another that culminates in intercourse. That is a picture of what it means to love her soul. She yearns to be known and that takes time and intimacy...As she is sought after, she reveals more of her beauty. As she unveils her beauty, she draws us to know her more deeply. Whatever else it means to be feminine, it is depth and mystery and complexity, with beauty as its very essence."

Looking at those quotes, we can see that the kind of beauty that a confident woman possesses is a mix of mystery and warm allure. It is a mystery that, as my husband wrote, "beckons" one "to stare long and hard". Women are complex; God made them very detailed. The trinity is likewise mysterious. But that is a good thing, and when one begins to explore the mysteries, depth and richness is discovered. That brings us to a third way in which woman bears God's image.

3) Women want to be romanced, or in other words, pursued.

As Paula said in the quote above, a woman's beauty and mystery "invites you always a little deeper into the essence of really knowing her." My husband was "beckoned" to stare- for a loooooong time!

God is beautiful and mysterious. He desires that His beauty and mystery would allure us to seek Him. He promised that if we seek Him with all our heart, we would know Him. God wants to be our priority. He wants us to pursue Him, spend time with Him, talk to Him, listen to Him. He desires our attention. He longs for our love. So He put those same desires in woman, to reveal Himself to us.

A woman is beautiful and mysterious. She wants to be sought after with the whole heart of her pursuer, just as God does. She wants intimacy. She yearns to be known. She wants her husband to talk to her, listen to her, spend time with her, enjoy her. She longs for his attention and love. This is one way she bears God's image, as a female.

This is precisely why, in 1 Peter 3:7, husbands are told to live with their wives "in an understanding way" or "according to knowledge". God knows the desires of a woman because He put them there, to reveal His own desires to us. Yes, women are complex, and some men may think they will never understand a woman. But God has commanded them to at least understand their woman. A husband is commanded to know his wife. This is what every wife longs for.

Yet there is no way to grow in understanding and knowledge of a woman unless you spend time with her. Just as God does, she longs to be sought after and pursued. That is what it means to be romanced. It takes time and intimacy.

"Why do our days seem so unimportant, filled not with romance and adventure but with duties and demands? We feel unseen, even by those who are closest to us. We feel unsought- that no one has the passion or the courage to pursue us." (Stasi Eldredge)

"Most of our addictions as women flare up when we feel that we are not loved or sought after...every woman wants to be seen, wanted, and pursued...We desire to possess a beauty that is worth pursuing." (Stasi Eldredge)

"Cut off from love, rejected, no one pursuing her, something in a woman wilts like a flower no one wants anymore. She withers into resignation, duty...the radiance of her countenance goes out...but this same woman...becomes lovely and inviting when she is pursued. Her heart begins to come alive...what happened...was merely the power of romance releasing her true beauty, awakening her heart. She has come alive. As women we long to be loved in a certain way, a way unique to our femininity. We long for romance. We are wired for it; that's what makes our heart come alive." (Stasi Eldredge)

"We don't have to be embarrassed by our desire to be romanced. It is a true, glorious longing in our hearts! It is, in fact, where we bear the image of God. God loves romance." (Stasi Eldredge)

Women do often feel unseen. Unsought. I know I do. And it is truly one of the most difficult things to deal with, when we feel like no one has the passion to pursue us. I am good enough to work and serve...and I want to do that, but I also want to be desired. Enjoyed. Pursued.

It is so true that our addictions flare up when we are not pursued. Some of us might eat to fill the loneliness. Maybe we lose ourselves in movies, or novels, or soap operas- where we can temporarily feel like we are being pursued. Maybe we busy ourselves with all sorts of service, work, and activities so that we can try and forget our desires. There are so many addictions- shopping, gossiping, exercising- the list can go on.

If we are not pursued, in our human nature, we will fill that void with our addictions while, at the same time, withering into resignation and duty. Something in us dies. It is our heart. Our feminine heart that longs to be romanced, to be noticed, to be wanted.

But when we are romanced, boy do we come alive in all our feminine glory!

Husbands are commanded to love us the way we need to be loved- to pursue us (that is how they get to know us and understand the depths of us). But husbands are humans who sin and fail.

"You are made for romance, and the only one who can offer it to you consistently and deeply is Jesus."

In that quote, Stasi is not saying that Jesus is the only one who can offer us romance. No, God does want our husbands to meet those needs. BUT the only one who can offer us romance CONSISTENTLY and DEEPLY is Jesus.

"We have all heard it said that a woman is most beautiful when she is in love. It's true. When a woman knows that she is loved, she glows from the inside. This radiance stems from a heart that has had its deepest questions answered. "Am I lovely? Am I worth fighting for? Have I been and will I continue to be romanced?" When these questions are answered, yes, a restful, quiet spirit settles in a woman's heart."

"You have been and you will continue to be romanced all your life...every memory you cherish, every moment that has moved you to holy tears, all have been given to you from the One who has been pursuing you from your first breath in order to win your heart. God's version of flowers and chocolates and candlelight dinners comes in the form of sunsets and falling stars, moonlight on the lakes and cricket symphonies; warm wind, swaying trees, lush gardens and fierce devotion...He knows what takes your breath away, knows what makes your heart beat faster."

"We have missed many of his love notes simply because we shut down our hearts in order to endure the pain of life. Now, we must open our hearts again...so that we can hear his whispers, receive his kisses...If we listen, a Sacred Romance calls to us through our heart...it whispers to us in the wind...reaches out to us through the touch of someone we love...we've sensed it at the birth of our first child, been drawn to it while watching the shimmer of a sunset on the ocean...Something calls to us through experiences like these and rouses an inconsolable longing, deep within our heart, wakening in us a yearning for intimacy, beauty and adventure."

"God has been wooing you ever since you were a little girl...What romanced your heart as a girl? Horses in a field? The fragrance of the air after a summer rain? Was it a favorite book like the Secret Garden? The first snowfall in winter?...These were all whispers from your Lover, notes sent to awaken your heart's longings."

"God has written the romance not only on our hearts but all over the world around us. What we need is for him to open our eyes, to open our ears that we might recognize his voice calling to us, see his hand wooing us in the beauty that quickens our heart."

"The whole world was made for romance- the rivers and glens, the meadows and beaches. Flowers, music, a kiss. But we have a way of forgetting all that, losing ourselves in work and worry. Eve-God's message to the world in feminine form-invites us to romance. Through her, God makes romance a priority of the universe."

"Life changes dramatically when romance comes into our lives. Christianity changes dramatically when we discover that it, too, is a great romance. That God yearns to share a life of beauty, intimacy and adventure with us..."

"We were created to be the object of desire and affection of one who is totally and completely in love with us...What would it be like to experience for yourself that the truest thing about his heart toward yours is not disappointment or disapproval but deep, fiery, passionate love? That is, after all, what a woman was made for."

Beauty and mystery invite us to go deeper. If you hear beautiful music, you want to sit down and listen again and drink it in. It captures your attention. A garden calls one to enter in, explore, and feast upon the beauty. A great book draws us in, we can't wait to get back to it, spend time with it. These are all of the responses that God wants of us. All of the responses a woman wants too.

God is beautiful, mysterious, and longs to be sought after. That is why He put these qualities in females...that is how we bear the image of the One who made us. When we look at all that He created, we know God loves romance. He invented it. And because He loves romance, so does woman. It is another way we reveal God to the world.

The above are where and how females bear God's image, but there are more ways. I will discuss these in my last post on this topic.

Made in God's Image, as a Female: Beauty

The Bible tells us that humans were made in the image of God Himself. Genesis 1:27 says, "So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."

Male and Female. Both were made in God's image, but not in the same way. One was made a male and the other a female. We were not made in the image of God physically, since God is a spirit. So we can conclude we were made in His image inside of us. There are many characteristics of God that both man and woman share, but there are some that are distinctively given to each particular gender to show forth an aspect of God's image through that gender.

So, as a woman, how do you reveal God's nature to the world? If you are a man reading this, how does your wife, daughter, sister, girlfriend, etc. display the image of her Maker to those around her? I learned so much through reading "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge. I will be quoting from them much in this post. As they wrote in their book, "What did God mean when He created woman in His image? God wanted to reveal something about Himself, so he gave us Eve. What can we learn from her?"

I will begin with the words written by my husband many years ago in a letter to me, because, as you will see, they so perfectly illustrate the first three ways women bear the image of God in their femininity.

"Some may say there's not much in a name, but I say there is much in the name of the one I love. She, Esther Ruth, is a "star" in my life. Out of her shines what I call true beauty; a beauty that this fallen world knows not much of. Just like the distant stars of the sky, there is a mystery about her. This mystery beckons me to stare long and hard at who she really is. Where does she come from? What's going on in the midst of her?"

My husband mentioned how he found in me beauty and mystery and how those characteristics "beckoned" him to stare long and hard! So these will be the first three characteristics I shall speak of.

1) More than anything else in creation, a woman reveals God's beauty to the world. She was God's most detailed creation, and her body alone is God's most beautiful work of art. John mentioned in his book how he and his wife realized that most of the paintings they saw in museums showing the naked form were ones of women. They did not see a single painting of a nude man, though some do exist. God made a man strong, and a woman beautiful. Her form, her face, her eyes...they all reveal the beauty of God.

Women are born wanting to be beautiful. Little girls like to dress up as princesses and brides and the like, to brush each others hair, and dance around the house. They want to capture attention, especially that of their daddies. They are asking, either aloud or just inside, "Do you think I'm beautiful?" Why? Because it is part of who they are to ask such a question; instinctively, they know that one of their purposes in life is to reveal the beauty of God.

The Eldredges told a story of a little girl who went from office to office, singing for everyone, fully expecting to be delighted in: "A little girl in her glory, unashamed in her desire to delight, and be delighted in." They shared another story of a six year old girl who told her mother about the most wonderful dream she had ever had. She was a queen, in a beautiful dress and with a crown upon her head. Her mother asked her why it was such a wonderful dream and the daughter answered, "I just love feeling that way!" When asked what way, she spoke one word as her answer: "Beauty."

Of course, outward beauty does not hold substance. Women can show the beauty of God most through their inner loveliness. In 1 Peter, God exhorts women to not be merely beautiful on the outside, but that they should cultivate inner beauty, which is very precious to Him. Women want to have this inner beauty, the kind that a good man is drawn to and that their girlfriends appreciate.

"Every woman wants to have a beauty to unveil. Not to conjure, but to unveil. Most women feel the pressure to be beautiful from very young, but that is not what I speak of. There is also a deep desire to simply and truly be the beauty and be delighted in." (John Eldredge)

"What a man is usually drawn to in a woman is two steps past her physical appearance. While he may lack the words to express this, intuitively he knows he has stumbled on someone who can glimpse his heart, who seems to know him in ways he has always longed to be known. A man has a hunger that can only be touched by the innate kind of beauty you possess." (Paula Rinehart in her book Sex and the Soul of a Woman).

I know that one of my greatest desires is to be delighted in, to be enjoyed and desired. From God and from my husband, and all others whom I touch. It is inner beauty that is delighted in. What does this inner beauty look like? A "gentle" and "quiet" spirit, according to God's word. That simply means a spirit at rest, quieted by God's love and walking in a peaceful way. Not striving. "The only thing getting in the way of our being fully captivating and enjoyed is our striving." (Eldredge)

"A woman of true beauty is a woman who in the depths of her soul is at rest, trusting God because she has come to know Him to be worthy of her trust. She exudes a sense of calm, a sense of rest...she speaks comfort...she assures others all is well and all will be well...she offers others grace to be and the room to become...like a release...we can breathe...A woman in her glory, a woman of beauty, is a woman who is not striving to become beautiful or worthy or enough. She knows in her quiet center where God dwells that he finds her beautiful."

"Every once in a while, a woman walks into a room and you know that she knows that God calls her beautiful. There is peace and strength and energy that come from belonging to Him. There is confidence that is captivating." (Angela Hunt in her book "Do You Think I'm Beautiful?")

What is so important about beauty? Do we need it? Does the world need beauty? Yes, for beauty speaks to us that all is well, it comforts and inspires us, and it nourishes us: "It is the kind of food our souls crave. A woman's breast is among the loveliest of all God's works, and it is with her breast that she nourishes a baby- a stunning picture of the way in which beauty itself nourishes us."

"Beauty is transcendent- it is our most immediate experience of the eternal...sometimes the beauty is so deep it pierces us with longing...for life as it was meant to be. Beauty reminds us of an Eden we have never known, but somehow know our hearts were created for. Beauty speaks of heaven to come, when all shall be beautiful. It haunts us with eternity. Beauty says, there is a glory calling to you. And if there is a glory, there is a source of glory. What great goodness could have possibly created this? What generosity gave us this to behold? Beauty draws us to God."

"Beauty is the essence of a woman. We want to be perfectly clear that we mean both physical beauty and a soulful/spiritual beauty...the world cheapens and prostitutes beauty, making it all about a perfect figure few women can attain, but christians minimize it too, or overspiritualize it, making it all about "character"...God gave Eve a beautiful form and a beautiful spirit. She expresses beauty in both."

"I sit outside on a summer evening and just listen and behold and drink it all in, and my heart begins to quiet and peace begins to come into my soul...This is what it's like to be with a woman at rest, a woman comfortable in her feminine beauty. She is enjoyable to be with. She is lovely...You relax and believe once again that all will be well."

I recently found an amazing poem which partly read as such: "The face is like that of an angel...The skin of the creation is like dove's silk. The scent of the hair is sweeter than rose petals. The touch is gentle and comforting. This creation is woman... Her warm embrace is like a soft blanket. Her smile fills my heart with joy...Her beauty is inside and out; yes, this is true, but I speak not of her beauty alone. For her beauty proclaims God's glory...even if she said not a word, who she is would show God's glory and beauty."

C.S. Lewis once wrote: "The beauty of the female is the root of joy to the female as well as to the male...to desire the enjoying of her own beauty is the obedience of Eve, and to both it is in the lover that the beloved tastes her own delightfulness." Yes, that is a deep quote. Read it again. There is an important truth in it.

"The reason a woman wants a beauty to unveil, the reason she asks, Do you delight in me? is simply because God does as well. God is captivating beauty."

To desire the enjoying of her own beauty is the obedience of Eve. Wow, that is powerful insight.

Women are just obeying (instictively) their nature as females when they want to be beautiful, desired, enjoyed and delighted in. As Angela Thomas wrote, "The longing to be known as beautiful is a part of our design as women. God put us together this way on purpose. We are wired to long for beauty and to be known as beautiful." God wants all the same things, so He has put those characterisitcs of Himself in woman to reveal His own beauty and His desire for us to enjoy that beauty!

**Now, for a side note. God desires to use fathers and husbands and friends to affirm a woman's beauty...but none can answer this question that is attached to a woman's soul- Do You Think I'm Beautiful?- the way only God can.

"If the question "Do you think I'm beautiful?" came attached to my soul, then maybe the answer wasn't ever meant to fully come from this world. Maybe the purpose of the question is to take me by the hand and walk me into the presence of the Creator."

"The questions are rightfully mine, but the answers that truly fill and give stregnth will come only from God. It is so okay for my soul and yours to scream, "Do you think I'm beautiful?" And there is a transformation happening in my life as I listen to God tell me, resoundingly, "Yes"...If I knew that God called me beautiful, I could pursue my passions and live and love with abandon...the desparate search would be over. I would be noticed. Desired. Known." (Angela Thomas)

Do you now see how females were born with this longing to be beautiful? Do you understand why they have such a longing? Do you comprehend what the longing speaks to us of God? About His beauty? And about His desire for us to notice, enjoy and delight in His beauty?

These longings a woman has are not wrong. They were put there by the God who made them. They are, in fact, one of the ways women bear the image of God as females.

In my next post, I will write about the next way women reveal God's image...and it was also illustrated in my husband's letter to me.

Wednesday's Walk Down Memory Lane

I found this last week, and thought that today I would participate. But I was quite busy and never thought up a blog.

Yet now I don't even have to think about what memories I shall write about. It came to me...there is someone I am thinking of and all the pieces fell into place drawing me to write about her.

Some of my readers have heard this story, but for the many that have not, here I go.

My walk down memory lane began when I was driving down the road today. I passed schoolbus after schoolbus and every single time I saw one, with it I saw a beautiful woman smiling at me. Her name was Gail. She was my highschool bus driver. She was my second mother. My spiritual mother.

Now she is home with her God, tenderly in His care.

But I miss her.

Tonight we stopped at Taco Bell for dinner and as I sat there eating, I again thought of Gail. My mind went back to a conversation I had with her about those tacos and memories of her stopping by Taco Bell when I was working there flooded my mind.

Well, when I went on the computer this evening and noticed that my friend, Brian (Gail's son), had uploaded photos of his wedding, and that Gail was sitting there in the first one...my heart just sighed.

So that did it. I knew I had to write about her for "Wednesday's Walk Down Memory Lane."

I met Gail when I began a new school year with her as my bus driver. At some point, she invited me to her home for a Thanksgiving open house. That night I happened to meet my husband there. At some point I realized that Gail went to the same church that my family was attending (it was a BIG one, so I guess I never noticed before...). I began going to her youth group, which she held inside her home. That led to being discipled by her, along with a few other teenage girls. The friendship grew into one in which I stayed over her house for hours on end and even traveled with her. She truly became a mother figure to me. Don't get me wrong, I love my mother and would come home telling her all the stories about my friends. But Gail offered me something that no one else did.

Much of my teenage life was spent depressed and with low self-confidence. Then, when I was 16, I gave my heart to Jesus and my life truly changed. It was amazing. Well, let me correct myself...my heart changed. You know, God changes your heart and then as your mind is transformed so is your life. Well, God used Gail more than anyone to change my life.

There was so much love and affirmation coming from her toward me. She really cared about me and showed that care in her words, touches and time given. My senoir year of high school, I had a crush on one of her sons (not the one I mentioned above). Well, one day Gail actually told me that she cannot think of anyone she would rather like for her son. I was blown away. I still am. I mean, to accept me is one thing. But she was basically saying she would choose me if the choice was up to her. Wow. Can you imagine how loved I felt by her? Yes, Gail loved me...and I loved her.


This photo was taken inside her house, and it perfectly illustrates the confidence her love instilled in my thirsty heart. She really took time to recognize the beauty in me and draw it out of me. She told me that I am a beautiful woman of God and that God had given me the perfect name. She told me that I am like a rose blossoming and my gentleness shines upon all. She said that I may be small, but God can use me mightily.

One day Gail spoke the following word over me: "Your heart shall be a resting place for many that I shall send your way, for your heart has come into My peace and knows the way for others searching to find the way to that peace...be that peaceful way station for them along their arduous way, for they shall find rest and peace for their souls...Be, and I shall do...step forth with vastitude, for My hand is upon you to bring your success and to lead you with sureness and wisdom." She would pray for me, gently caressing my hair as she spoke. She gave me hugs often, and no one on earth has EVER given me a hug like hers. They were so warm and inviting, but also full of substance. Her eyes sparkled with the joy of the Lord continually.

On my wedding day, she styled my hair and worked her makeup magic on my face.


She also made me look so beautiful the night my hubby and I (before we married) celebrated New Years together.


Through Gail, I realized both some of my inner and some of my outer beauty.

Tonight I met with a friend who is teaching me skills in ballet technique. This is yet another connection to Gail. One day all of us youth were leaving a service in her church van together, when my dear husband (we were only friends then though:) had to use the gentleman's room. I went back into the church with him, and waited for him outside the bathroom door. I was overcome with joy and just started dancing in the foyer.

Upon coming back into Gail's van, she quietly spoke something to me which gave me a new hope and resolve to dance. She shared how, from where she was sitting in the van, she had seen me dance inside the church. No one else saw, she assured me, but she did and had thought it was beautiful and that I should further pursue dancing. She said that my dance was one of beauty, joy and freedom and encouraged me that God can heal people and minister to them through my dancing. I was slightly embarrassed to hear that I had been seen, for my dance was in pure abandonment to my Heavenly Father. Yet, at the same time, I was encouraged and inspired! Now here I am years later, and I am still slowly taking steps to further pursue my passion that, before I shared the video here on my blog, Gail was one of the only people to ever see me dance. I believe God ordained her to see me and draw me out in yet another way.

Thank you for reading and sharing in my memories of this beautiful woman of God whose legacy lives on in the hearts of so many that she touched. I know that I am only one of them, but I also know that she and I shared a relationship based on mutual love and that I will always hold her memory as sacred in my heart- a memory of the woman who mothered me.

Wordless Wednesday- My Man and His Ways With Females

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